News‎ > ‎NHL‎ > ‎

Goodbye Gomez, Hello Higgins

posted Jul 1, 2009, 5:39 AM by Steven Seagal
The Rangers ended their Latino Eskimo experiment as they traded Scott Gomez (yes, he's from Alaska) and two prospects to Montreal for Chris Higgins and defensemen Pavel Valentenko and Ryan McDonagh. More importantly, the Canadiens agreed to take on the 7 mil owed to Gomez, clearing up some cap space.
Since the Rangers have been linked to Dany Heatley via preliminary discussions and NY Post rumor milling, one would assume that the Rangers are making room for the disgruntled Ottawa star. Not true, jerkoffs. Well, almost true, jerkoffs. According to reports, the Heatley to Edmonton trade speculation is either completely false or a set in stone done deal.
Perhaps Glen Sather could strike a deal with Heatley while Edmonton brass sit up in Edmonton and do whatever Edmonton yokels do. I imagine it involves moose hunting. Maybe the Rangers could strike a deal with Tampa Bay for Vincent Lecalvalier?
Regardless, let's give a warm Ramon Hernandez Put Down The Gun greeting to Chris Higgins, Ryan McDonagh and Pavel Valentenko. So long Gomez and thanks for nothing.
I did a Google image search for "Chris Higgins" and this is what I got. "Hard to believe he's from snobby white upperclass Smithtown, Long Island" says the ever racist Dr. Foxyrotten