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Ben Roethlisberger Didn't Rape Anyone and Ramon Hernandez Put Down The Gun Will Tell You Why

posted Jul 23, 2009, 11:58 AM by Steven Seagal   [ updated Jul 23, 2009, 12:57 PM ]

Before undertaking research to publish this post, Ramon Hernandez Put Down The Gun was certain that he was innocent of not only raping the money hungry tramp, err we mean casino hostess, but Ben was probably innocent of even thinking about raping the cash starved greed whore. The woman in question is ugly. Plus.......

Ben LOVES dogs! Here's a professionally photographed photo of Hercules, Ben and Zeus. This photo was sent to every one of Ben's teammates and also Zeus and Hercules' wrestle buddies from the local dog park. What kind of sick fuck accuses a dog lover of rape?
 Lookit! He let's them kiss him all over!
Ben can get some sweet lovin' even when he looks like a caveman ogre frat boy. Why would he rape a woman when he already has drunk chicks at his disposal?


Here is more evidence of Ogre Ben's oozing machismo charisma. We agree Ben, winking at the camera is hard. Practice makes perfect.
If he did rape the woman in question, he'd have to make a quick getaway. The last time he tried to get away real fast, this happened.
So in conclusion, Ben was right to shoot down the rape accusations. Seriously people, Must we remind you that the man gives the thumbs up for dogs?
Also, how are we so sure it wasn't this guy instead?