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Omar Minaya: "In Addition, Adam Rubin Also Ran A Prostitution Ring."

posted Jul 30, 2009, 7:30 AM by Steven Seagal   [ updated Jul 30, 2009, 8:21 AM ]
Embattled New York Mets General Manager called a hastily organized press conference for 10AM today at Citi Field, sparking speculation amongst reporters that Omar would be issuing a public apology to NY Daily News reporter Adam Rubin for his wildly inappropriate ambush of the reporter at Tuesday's press conference announcing the firing of Mets executive Tony Bernazard.  At Tuesday's conference, Omar singled out Rubin, who was present, and insinuated that Rubin broke a story highly critical of Bernazard so that he could take Bernazard's job.  Outcry from the sports media was immediate and deafening.  Omar and the NY Mets organization have been on the defensive ever since, and an "apology conference" has seemed inevitable.
Therefore, when Omar requested at the start of the conference that Rubin, who was characteristically seated in a back corner, move to a front a center seat, the assembled press corps waited with great anticipation to witness a heartfelt apology to one of their own.  As Omar took the podium, he addressed Rubin directly, saying: "Adam, much has been made of the comments I made Tuesday that you had lobbied for a player development job within the organization.  I am here to say to you today that I let you off the hook easy."  Shock and indignation rippled through the press room as Omar's words sunk in.  He then addressed the assembled press corps as a whole.  "Ladies and gentlemen, Adam Rubin broke the story to take Tony Bernazard's job.  In addition, Adam Rubin also ran a prostitution ring."
As the anger at Omar's initial comments turned to utter slack-jawed disbelief and silence, Omar stepped to the side of the podium to reveal a projector screen displaying the image seen below: (He also provided the link if you would like to read it full sized:
"Well, Adam?... Or should I say "Kevin Provencher," what have you got to say for yourself?" Omar went on to address a visibly flabbergasted and dumbfounded Rubin.  "Omar, I don't... know... what you're talking about," stuttered the baffled Rubin.  Omar then addressed the entire audience, saying "I think it's obvious to all of us that "Adam" here is really Kevin Provencher (I always thought he looked French, didn't you?) and has been running a prostitution ring in two states AND Canada (see?  Probably French Canada).  Kevin, your ruse is exposed.  I think you owe an apology to the Daily News, to the New York sports media who rallied to your defense these past few days, and most of all... to me."
Omar was then removed from the podium by Jeff Wilpon himself with the help of Mets staffers.  After muscling Minaya off the stage, a visibly disturbed Wilpon returned to the podium to apologize for Omar's actions, to explain that nobody in the front office was aware of this press conference until an intern informed them that WFAN and SNY were carrying it live, and to assure the assembled media that Omar had been escorted from the building and was summarily terminated in his role of GM with the NY Mets.