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Nate McClouth Escapes from the Clutches of Pirates

posted Jun 4, 2009, 8:12 AM by Steven Seagal   [ updated Jun 4, 2009, 8:31 AM ]
It sounds like the basis of a big Hollywood movie but this is real life, people.  Irishman Nate McClouth, who has been held captive by Pirates along Pittsburgh's Allegheny river, was rescued by the American Indian group called the Braves of Atlanta. According to sources around Pittsburgh, apparently Nate McClouth was asked to play baseball, and reportedly McClouth was paid to do so in American currency, not Spanish Doubloons. Nate was paid a healthy sum too, but many believe he was coerced to remain a prisoner for three additional years via common date rape procedures. What's most surprising is that the Pirates underwent negotiations with the Braves of Atlanta. The American Indians simply traded three of their weakest tribe members for the highly talented Irishman McClouth and much like the Pirates, the Braves of Atlanta expect the Irishman to play baseball. It is widely speculated that the three weak tribe members have been stricken with small pox. This information was probably known by the Pirates along Pittsburgh's Allegheny river as they have been infamous for their poor negotiation tactics, prisoner scouting and overall terrible management.

The above photo shows the fierce Pirates along Pittsburgh's Allegheny river. The seaworthy vessel was acquired from the Northern Yankees of New York City last year in exchange for Xavier Nady and Damaso Marte.