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My name is Wendell Jackson, You like OJ? Are you Black?

posted Dec 6, 2008, 11:33 AM by Steven Seagal   [ updated Feb 15, 2009, 12:44 PM ]

Boy, do I love orange juice. I'm also a black person that hates male peoples. No, not those funny dressin' white folk that deliver eviction notices and welfare checks! I do hate them though, but only when they bring the bad news. Man, just leave that stuff at the male place, not to my porch!  What I'm talking about are the males in general. You know, like I don't like the man. Always bein all, "do this, do that". Or you know, like how the man be always telling you, "You can't pee there" or "Excuse me, would you mind not masturbating on the bus" or "Sir, would you please stop screaming". You can't tell me what to do! I served in Vietnam. I bought these zubaz pants with my own coin. No one gave them to me. You like my shades? Yeah, they on so I can stare down men folk who try to put me in places like hospitals or jail cells.  I also like waffles. Now if only I could get all us folks together who like dranking cups of orange juice and hates males together at the same time. That's why I'm holding this here sign. You see, I'll be serving free orange juice that I paid for with my government check and giving it to anyone who wants it. But you got to hate the man and you got to be black. This ain't no rainbow coalition.  What's that? Wait a second, What? Who the fuck is OJ Simpson?
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